opportunities...

 Andre called me. He wants me to work for him again as a traveling salesperson. Part of me thinks that's a great idea. The other part thinks that he is not a safe bet. I want to help him achieve his dreams, of course, but I know how he is. I know he's not reliable. But, it would give me plenty of time to write. And do book signings. And maybe talks. And still do life coaching. And potentially travel with Heath. 

It doesn't fulfill my need for a home and community, but it definitely gives me the freedom my soul craves. It also lets me travel as desired. That will be good. 

I have to figure out the best way to market my book. Granted, it has to be done first. Still waiting on my dad. He said it would be done tomorrow a few days ago. I'll call him on monday if it's still not done. I just want to get the ball rolling and money coming in... so that I can afford to keep going on this.

Book and other thoughts

 So, my book is done. The kindle version is correct and published. I haven't announced it anywhere yet, because most people want the paperback option and I want that to be a thing before I really start marketing. I really can't wait. My dad is doing to formatting for me for the paperback, which is probably not the best idea, because he's not great at finishing projects. But, I don't really know what else I would do. I don't have the program to do it, and knowing me, I'd get so frustrated because it'd be difficult. 

Heath has returned to my life. I don't know what that means, or what the future looks like. But we've talked through most of the issues that caused the blowout in Oregon to happen. There's been some progress, and some backsliding. But, with the open air between us, there's a relief for sure. 

I tried dating. I went on 4 dates after getting to Georgia. A little bit of sexting other men... but there's just so much of me that doesn't want anyone else. We've worked hard getting through the ups and downs, scraping all that just feels terrible. Plus, honestly, I don't even know how we progressed past that first date, I have no idea how to replicate it. I can't seem to maintain anyone's interest past the initial meeting- even if they say they are. 

At least I know he loves me to the degree in which he's capable of at this point, and I know that I'm safe with him. 

results

 It did produce results. He's been in contact, in a good way. Upswing again? I don't know. I can't worry about it right now, because all I'm doing is going from one day to the next. 

The book is technically published as an kindle book right now. It'll need updating as soon as I get the number back for the library of congress. I didn't realize it was different than the copyright. 

I took a job at the marina restaurant. I'm not sure about it though. It feels like I'm caving to the man because of money requirements.

It's stressful. Everything is.