11 days of no sun....

It was the longest 11 days of my life. But, today the sun came out and there is hope once again.  It's funny how much the sun equals hope for me.
But, today it is out. Today I went to the gym. And am sitting at Starbucks learning French. Just how they pronounce the alphabet is different, I wouldn't be surprised at all if I'll learn to read and write it long before I can understand/speak it.

Coming back to Ohio has been hard overall. Mostly because of coming back to Cracker Barrel. Lots of work, lots of pain for not very much money. Grinders is hiring for their new Hartville location on the 22nd, so I think I'm going to go apply for that. I feel bad for doing it, but there is just so much SHIT at Cracker Barrel, I really just don't want to be a part of it anymore. I don't want to deal with it. They're trying to suck my soul out of me. We'll see, because I really do appreciate Doug and them putting me back on the schedule for the asking.

Been thinking ALOT lately. Coming back to lots of christian friends has inspired lots of christ centered conversation. It's also gotten me to a point of frustration with people I see trying to have a relationship with God. Trying to be good, trying. Stop trying, I want to tell them. It's simple. So very simple, really. Just BE. When you become a Christian, you revamp your consciousness to the "Christ consciousness" you can be in tune with God, people, and creation if you stop trying. Be free of guilt, the only condemnation is in your own head.
"Body bound man creates his own condemnation by isolating himself from God. To be saved he must reestablish his realization of inseparable unity with the Divine Immanence. - In waking, eating, working dreaming, sleeping, serving, meditating, chanting, divinely loving, my soul constantly hums unheard by any; God, God, God."
It's so very simple. The ease of it all is exemplified in star wars, do or do not, there is no try. Or the Matrix- stop trying to hit me and just hit me.
It really is just like Neo learning to free his mind. That's exactly what it is like becoming a Christian. Free your mind of the notions of sin. Just do what is right. You have the connection to the Spirit. you know what is right, just do it.  Live in the spirit and the moment. Things work out so magically.