georgia

So I'm here at my aunts place- bored. Been watching too much tv. But don't know what else to do. motivation is hard. There are days I only speak a dozen words.  I could go hiking, but I didn't want to do all the hikes the first week. Obviously there's more than that, but, going to see too many waterfalls in a short period of time leaves you a bit... numb to their beauty. 
Nice days I go spend the mornings back on the lake- sitting on the beach or on a floaty in the water. It's not a bad life.  It's just pretty sucky being alone and not doing anything. Not having anyone to talk to. I am not created to be a hermit.
I have 9 more days.
I did go on tindr to see if I could find anyone to hang out with- I mean, just having someone to go out on hikes with, would have been a nice thing. But, that didn't really pan out. There was a couple that were interested, but not really- and then one that was- I did end up driving the hour and 45 minutes to meet him, but that was a bust. He was nice, but not confident at all in who he was. And short. So- that was a bummer.
Which brings me to my current rant. Why are guys not man enough to express interest? If you're interested- be goddamm interested!
I had a friend that I've known for 11 years or so, tell me that he's always wanted me. We lived near by, sorta, for a few years, and since have lived really far apart. We have close to nothing in common but a good sense of humor.  So, I have never seen it being a thing to pursue, and, he's never really made any steps in that direction besides hinting.  I need a man to want me. To pursue me to the ends of the earth. But, a man such as that does not exist, I fear.
How does everyone else have someone made for them, yet mine just say no. Not you. Not this lifetime. How am I 33 almost - I've got 9ish more years before menopause- and then apparently everything isn't fun anymore. I have fire in my veins and a heart brimming over with love to give- but no one wants it, (just the good time roll in the hay) and I'm about to be old.  It's just sad. Oh well.