So many emotions

There were so many emotions yesterday. I held them all in for the most part all day long, but when evening finally came, I just broke.
I was supposed to be spending one more night with the boy on the floor of his camper, but I knew as the day went on, that I wouldn't be able to. Him being kind but distant would break me. So, I ended up getting a hotel room for the night, switching the days around. He came over too to take a shower and watch a movie with me, trying to remain normal, I think. But I wasn't feeling normal. I didn't know where the boundaries were now. My body was in such a state of mass confusion and stress that I'd found it impossible to be warm all day long, so as we're laying apart on top of the bed he noticed that I was shaking. He insisted that I get under the covers, and he lay beside me, and put his feet on mine to warm them up. My body finally quit with the intense cold that there was literally no reason for. I think my core temperature was messed up.
As soon as he had left for the evening and the door shut behind him, I was doubled over in wracking cant-breathe sobs.  I guess I just had to get it all out there. It didn't last too long.
Today, I'm better. I knew I would be. I had to cry out those intense emotions and sleep it all off.

How do I proceed from here? I haven't the slightest idea. Rewind and one step at a time, I guess. We'll see how it plays out.

I'm meeting up with a woman tomorrow about a house, and then I start my job on Thursday.  Deep breaths.