As I tried to go to sleep last night, my mind wouldn't calm. I wanted to text him and ask him to call me, so that he would calm me down. But, you know how I said yesterday that I have the opposite emotions/reactions of the people around me? Not with him. I mirror his. To an extent. But, he was having a bad day yesterday, I could tell, so my mind was out of control.
Everyone is like "you're so brave! Going across the world by yourself, I couldn't do it!"
Goddamnit. I'm scared. I doing it anyhow. And I really want a hug and to be told that everything will be ok. But, instead everyone is fearing for my safety.
My head knows I'll be fine, but there's a bit of panic there too. The holy shit, what am I getting myself into, thought.
But to everyone I have to portray the "No worries, everything will be fine." Because they need the reassurance.
Where's that trust? Eh, off to the side. It's there, still visible. So why do I feel the need for reassurance?
sigh
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