god

 

I have such a weird relationship with God these days. It’s been a gradual decline, I guess you could call it. I’ve never been one to subscribe to standard teachings or beliefs, but there have been times in the past where I felt so near and dear to God’s heart. Everything felt like it flowed in the synchronicity of the patterns that weave us all into the world and our place in it.  But, there was a time when things broke, when things fell off course. I felt like I had done everything right, followed all the signs, but then the bottom fell out from under me. In that moment, trust was broken.  Trust in the pattern, trust in my ability to read the signs. When the trust is gone, nothing seems to flow anymore. There’s still moments of synchronicity, but it feels like there are vast hiccups inbetween. So I focus on what I can control, if God is LOVE, then if I focus on sharing that love and being LOVE to all those that need it- maybe then I will feel close to God again. Maybe the magic will come back and the pattern and flow will be restored.