And so the spinning wheel goes

I have arrived to my destination- Cripple Creek Colorado. This adventure is the craziest yet, but promises to be the most epic.

I'm laying here on my king sized bed in a casino hotel, contemplating this past week and waiting on a call back from a casino restaurant about a job. We'll see what happens with that. I have a lot of paperwork to fill out, but I have what I think is an altitude headache and sleep deprivation. This happened the last time I was in Colorado also. I have this room until Thursday, which is a super inconvenient day to not have a place to stay- it being thanksgiving day. However, I'm not too concerned about it, either something will come up, or it won't. I have a car and lots of blankets. ;) But I doubt it will come to that.

So, down to the reason I am here.


So when I left North Carolina, I stopped  in Ohio, and then I slowly made my way across the Midwestern states- pausing in Kansas for a day and then off to Colorado. I had to kill a day in Colorado also, so I went sightseeing. But the thing with sightseeing when you’re by yourself, it takes literally no time at all. Hahah.
Yay cliff dwellings, yay garden of the gods… okay, now what?!

 So I went up to Manitou Springs – found a place to park and decided to walk around all the little tourist shops in the area. As I walked, I saw this guy sitting on a ledge wall, reading with a guitar next to him. He smiled at me in a friendly fashion as I walked past. I had this feeling that I should talk to him, but at the same time I’m thinking- ‘dude- not safe, strange hippy town, you’re a single female… ‘ I went into a little shop nearby and looked at stuff, not being able to shake the feeling that I should go talk to him. (Bear in mind that I’m still hungup on Costa Rica, so it’s not that I’m interested.)
So, I left the store and went back up the hill to talk to him. “Whatcha reading?” I ask him as I get closer. “The bible” he responds. My face says ‘no shit’ and I say, “yes, but where?” “John” he responds. I end up sitting down on the wall next to him and talking for the next 2 hours or so. We basically exchanged life stories. As I left to go on my merry way, I let him have the link to my travel blog. From which he added me on facebook. I didn’t really talk to him at all for the next month as I settled in to my routine in Seattle.

 I got back on Match.com once I got to Seattle and decided to stay, went out with 5-6 different guys. Ended up having 2 dates in one day twice… such a playa. Haha It wasn’t on purpose and totally stressed me out though when it worked out like that. But anyway- I had fun. They were all no’s. But there were a couple of 6’5” guys that were totally awesome, just because I felt small. Haha But yeah.

One day at work, this guy came in and found out that I was new to town. He suggested that I try his church, just to meet more people. He was off to Istanbul the next day- so he wouldn’t be there for the next few months, but still. I just laugh and think to myself.. “um no.” I hadn’t been to church in over a year at that point, and I had no desire to start again. So I dismissed it. A couple weeks later, I had gone on a hike with one of my dates, but found myself home before 5. This church started at 5, and for some reason, I felt like I was supposed to go. So I went. Not a single solitary person said a word to me. And, the message had me all up in arms. So much so I wanted to stand up and say something during service, which of course I would never do. But anyway, I left there completely irate. Haha I needed to vent, but with the time difference, there wasn’t really anyone I could call, so I ended up calling the Colorado guy and unleashed it all on him. Poor thing. Haha. Well, after that point, we were just friends. We talked probably once a week or so. During this point, I finally hit my breaking point with all the stress and just stopped. I’d been planning the future for so long that I forgot to exist right now, and so I stopped worrying about my next step. Well, as I’m going on all these dates, I realized something about myself- that I have chameleon like tendencies, so as not to create waves. These guys would only see the side of me that meshed with them, and then think they loved me. False. Haha Well, the Colorado guy, all of a sudden starts being more vocal in the fact that he’s crushing on me. And I’m like SHIT. That wasn’t supposed to happen at all. He’s my friend. He’s way too Christian, and has other issues that I didn’t want to deal with, and he’s in Colorado. Well, not this past Saturday but the one before, I wrote him a 2000 word email, explaining to him all the sides of me that he didn’t know. The anti-church side and everything. We ended up talking on the phone that night for 6 hours. Which is retarded. The next night it was 4 hours. “Do I need to move to Seattle?” he jokingly asked. “No! of course not.” I realized by this point- that we had a solid friendship base. We were constantly laughing about things, and just genuinely enjoying eachothers company. And then he loves me and thinks I’m magical. So I let down the walls and accept it. My work was not doing super well- they had cut my hours because it’s slow, and everyone got cut. I was having difficulty finding a new job, so I was like- “I can just come out there.” So, a week later, here I am.

Crazy as it may be. I decided that I love him. Like for realzy, no reservations. Which actually hasn't happened before, so I'm intrigued to see how this plays out. I'm playing for keeps.