just exhausted

Not enough sleep lately. And I'm still dreaming all the time.
Some days the let go is harder than others, yesterday I failed at that. I paid for it. Some days there's boundaries, some days there's not, yesterday I was too asleep to notice until too late. Then I couldn't fall back to sleep because of that knowledge.
Yesterday's dream had to do with him- some woman who struggled with the same social anxiety stuff that he does was giving a retreat on some island, so I was trying to go to it so I could tell him how she solved her issues. And I bought a super sexy dress. haha. So that was one dream. Then last nights was all about the atchafalya basin. We were in a small boat exploring it. He was showing off his alligators. I woke up still trying to pronounce it correctly. My brain instinctively wants to say it wrong so I have to concentrate each time.
Sigh. 
I get used to the high level of emotional and spiritual intimacy that we have, so sometimes I forget it's unsustainable at this point, it's still in flux.

I need sleep.